Anger

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Today's email is all about Anger. Sharing here...

Hi Joy,

In all human relationships, people will find certain behavioral characteristics irritating. Though the particular behaviors may differ, the resulting irritations often stir anger within us. For the most part, this anger is a distorted anger. By that I mean that the other person's behavior is not usually morally wrong; he or she has not perpetrated an evil against us. Their behavior simply violates our preferences. If the relationship is a close relationship and the person is one with whom we spend a great deal of time, such as in family or vocation, it is sometimes helpful to seek to mitigate these irritations by requesting change. Please notice I said requesting, not demanding or manipulating. None of us responds well to a demanding or manipulative approach. If we have a generally positive relationship, however, most of us are willing to respond well to requests.

The bottom line is that in most relationships, assuming we feel loved and respected by the other person, most of us are willing to make changes if they come in the form of a request rather than a demand. Such requests and subsequent changes can alleviate many of the irritating behaviors that stimulate anger.

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